Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
