Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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