I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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