Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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