Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
