I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
