i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize