bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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