if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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