Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
