youre lurking in front of me
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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