at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
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