There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize