I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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