If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
should my penis look like a turkey
two words...techno handjob
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I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
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I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex