real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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