My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
