How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
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Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
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For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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