Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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