She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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