No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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