Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
My bed smells like the plague
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
