1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Randomize
