Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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