One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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