Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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