i already hear my dad disowning me
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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