Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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