if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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