I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize