doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
