I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
