people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
