I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
