She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
