We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize