3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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