I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
