I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
