Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
