He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
