He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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