WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
