I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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