Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
