that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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