Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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