Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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