I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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