She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
