I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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