Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
